Wednesday, September 2, 2009

Firsts

First few days on campus: Witnessed a group of freshman orientees playing red rover. One team set up their line in front of a thick hedge of thorny bushes. They obviously have never played red rover before. A very determined girl broke through the line, ran halfway through the hedge, tripped through the other half, and face planted on the cement. It made my day.

First roommates: Walked into the kitchen during the middle of a conversation betwixt my roommates about their former boyfriends. Tried to make a sandwich and leave as quickly as possible, but was accosted. Conversation went as follows:

Roommates: Tee hee, what about you Drew? What's your baggage?

Me, already halfway out of the room: Oh, I've never had a boyfriend. Not really interested in dating.

Roommates: Silence

Me: Silence

Roommates: Buuuuuuttt....you think boys are cute right?

Me: Seeya

First day at church in student ward: Sunday school teacher asked if anyone could guess what the first lesson was on. Some kid said marriage. Teacher said yes. I thought it was a joke. It wasn't. Talked about what qualities we should emulate if we want to attract a good spouse. The teacher then talked how it was Satan's influence that was causing so many women to have careers nowadays. Said that women should only go to school to prepare to have children. On the way home, my roommates raved about how hot the teacher was. I felt nauseous.

First class: U.S Government. A boy asked if instead of the New York Times, he could watch Fox News as a source for current events.

First Book of Mormon class: The instructor told us that we had to read 1st Nephi through Alma 29 in the next ten days. He then told us that liars go to hell. He produced a letter he had received from a former student. The letter said that lying about the reading had slowly destroyed this student's soul and she was now writing to beg for forgiveness. I went home immediately after and dropped the class.



Go Cougars